Maybe
I still feel nothing. Is that normal? How can it be?
its not
So what's wrong with me? And why can't I think about how I feel? Maybe I do feel things, but I don't recognize them. I don't give them a chance to invade the rational thought process I'm constructed in my head. I must stick to it. It's my survival instinct. It's my inpenetrable wall.
i can't touch it
And its hard to make decisions. No wait, it's simple as hell to make decisions, but not decisions that I feel accurately reflect what I'd be doing if my heart had some say in the matter.
but maybe the heart really isn't suppose to matter
Maybe I'm smarter for it. Maybe I'm better for it. Maybe.